Is Self-Hypnosis a Super-Power?

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When most of us think of hypnosis, our minds tend to conjure particular scenes: a timepiece swinging from side to side; someone quacking like a duck for an audience’s amusement; a hypnotist creepily half-whispering some version of, “You’re getting sleeepyyy.” These classic images of hypnosis embedded in our collective consciousness give the practice a really bad rap. But the truth is, hypnosis—or hypnotherapy, as it’s referred to when practiced in clinical settings—has a number of practical benefits to offer. Research supports the use of hypnosis for everything from smoking cessation to weight loss. It’s been shown to yield powerful results for people dealing with panic attacks, sleep disturbances, chronic pain, low self-esteem, and much more. In short, the real practice of hypnosis is nothing like the dramatized versions we’ve been shown on television and stage shows. It’s a true healing practice, and the reason it works so well is far less spooky than you might imagine. 

Hypnosis, in essence, is all about connection. It’s a way of crossing over boundaries that tend to separate us from ourselves, others, and the world in general. When these boundaries are dissolved through hypnosis, the wisdom of the body and the unconscious mind can be recruited to generate powerful changes. Often, our attempts to create change at the conscious level only wind up getting us more stuck. For example, people with insomnia who try hard to fall asleep will usually discover that those well-intentioned, perfectly reasonable efforts only keep them more awake. But the truth is, the body and unconscious mind know precisely how to drift into deep sleep; and if the conscious mind gets out of the way, they’ll do it with ease. So that’s where hypnosis comes in—and, more specifically, where self-hypnosis comes in. 

Self-hypnosis is a practice we can all adopt to help us get more relaxed, sleep better, manage pain more effectively, and cope with mental and emotional challenges that arise throughout the day. The practice, which shares some things in common with meditation, can give us access to our own healing super-powers. By learning how to dissolve boundaries and create connections, we can access the extraordinary wisdom of our unconscious minds and bodies. 

The practice of self-hypnosis allows us to enter a flow state, in which changes can happen effortlessly and spontaneously. It helps us come back to the balanced state that is our true nature. Hypnosis isn’t some form of sorcery, as those classic images would have us believe, but it does help us tap into the magic that we carry around inside of us—the magic that helps us heal ourselves. 

Anyone can learn to hypnotize themselves; all it takes is a few simple tools and a little practice. If you’re intrigued, or think you could benefit from what self-hypnosis has to offer, join me at Innergy Meditation on Friday, January 18th from 7:30p.m. – 9:30p.m., and learn how you can Unleash Your Inner Healer Through Self-Hypnosis. I hope to see you there!

Making Friends With Fear

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“You gain strength, courage, and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face. You must do the thing which you think you cannot do.”
– Eleanor Roosevelt

This week’s post begins with a confession. When I first sat down to write this, I wound up spending a good amount of time staring at the blank word processor page in front of me, struggling to come up with a way to start this post. Something told me I needed to write about fear, but I wasn’t sure why, and I wasn’t sure how. Not feeling particularly inspired, I temporarily gave up. I toggled over to my web browser and decided to scroll through Facebook for a bit. In less than 30 seconds’ time, I was inundated with news headlines announcing another suicide bombing, this time in Lahore; videos featuring political mudslinging, with countless incendiary comments underneath; invitations to join groups taking action against threats to our natural environment; and more than a couple status updates reflecting negative views of the world and pessimistic thoughts about the future. After stepping away from the computer for a while to center myself and gather my thoughts, I came back to say this:

We have every reason to be afraid.  

I don’t mean to be discouraging or dramatic; I’m merely pointing out the undeniable reality of what it means to live in the world today. Everywhere we turn we’re flooded with news that calls into question our safety and security. Naturally, this evokes fear—the kind of fear that has the potential to overwhelm us and steal our peace.

On some level, all of us are affected by the current climate of fear, and without realizing it, we’re likely participating in perpetuating it. That’s because fear spreads and expands in the form of a giant feedback loop: Individuals experience fear and act with the intention to defend themselves against whatever caused that fear; these actions produce fear in other people, which leads them to react defensively; those actions spur more fear and more defensive reactions; and on, and on, and on we go.

The cycle of fear that we’re currently living in is facilitated by the technology that gives us instant access to information, and the media that delivers the information to us in particular ways. While it’s good to know what’s happening in the world, staying informed has a downside: It’s hard to avoid becoming fearful, anxious, or even paranoid when we’re constantly besieged by reasons to feel afraid. But we have a choice. We don’t have to keep participating in the cycle of fear.

How do we break the cycle of fear?

To understand how to break the cycle, we must first understand the nature of fear. The truth is, fear is an evolutionarily adaptive mechanism that keeps us alive. It’s an emotion designed to allow living beings to react to anything that threatens their survival. In the most simplistic sense, it works like this: When something in your environment provokes fear, your brain and body rev up to prepare you to respond by fighting, fleeing, or freezing.

While the fear response system is designed to help us survive, it’s not without its drawbacks—the biggest being that we experience fear and act to defend ourselves even when our survival isn’t being threatened. Just anticipating that something might threaten us is enough to make us fearful and reactive. It’s important to know this if we want to learn how to do fear differently.

When it comes to fear, what we need to determine is not how we can avoid feeling it, but rather how we can learn to develop a healthy relationship with it. As challenging as this may be, it creates the potential for a much more peaceful, much less reactionary existence.

So what does a healthy relationship with fear look like?

In my view, it’s a relationship that’s characterized by three fundamental qualities: Curiosity, Compassion, and Courage.

Curiosity – When we are overwhelmed by fear and anxiety, our minds seek certainty in an attempt to stabilize and feel safe again. Since what we tend to fear are things that are unfamiliar or unknown to us, our initial instinct may be to recoil or shut down. But it doesn’t have to be this way. We are capable of responding differently to the things—or people—that stoke our fear. Instead of allowing the emotion to repel us from that which makes us afraid, we have the choice to get curious about it instead. You see, curiosity is an incredible antidote to fear. When we are curious, we enter a childlike state of wonderment. We open ourselves up to discovering something new, allowing ourselves to be inquisitive and exploratory. When we learn to respond to our fearful instincts by soothing ourselves with curiosity, we loosen fear’s grip on us.

Compassion – As I mentioned earlier, humans have built-in mechanisms that prepare our bodies to fight (or freeze, or flee) when something threatens our survival. Thankfully, we don’t have too many immediate threats to our survival these days; but even feeling threatened is enough to make us act defensively. As our fight-or-flight mechanism starts pumping adrenaline through our system, we might find that other emotions—like annoyance, anger, disgust, aggressiveness, or contempt—start to make an appearance. In no time, our fear can become rage. The implications of this can be devastating—many of our current news headlines are proof of this. But once again, we have options. We don’t have to relate to fear this way. We can learn to respond to the things we fear with a sense of compassion. Of course, this isn’t easy. It takes effort and practice. But when we can extend compassionate kindness to the things we fear, aiming to accept them as they are, we make it possible for the fear to dissipate. Building a compassionate relationship with fear also means extending compassion toward ourselves whenever we feel fearful. There’s no denying that life can be scary, and fear is a natural human response. It’s important that we allow ourselves to feel the emotion of fear without becoming overwhelmed by it or judging ourselves for feeling it.

Courage – Something beautiful happens when instead of turning away from the things that make us fearful, we begin to move toward them instead. But this is no easy feat. It takes remarkable courage. Many people believe that to have courage means to live without fear; but that isn’t the case. Living courageously means acknowledging that the fear is there, taking a breath, and moving forward anyway. The world can be a terrifying place, and there’s no doubt we live in uncertain times. But we don’t have to be consumed by terror. We don’t have to close ourselves off from the things we are uncertain about. We can, as Eleanor Roosevelt said, learn to look fear in the face. And when we do, we will surely find that beautiful things start to happen.

“Everything you want is on the other side of fear.”– Jack Canfield

Fundamental Factors of Successful Recovery from Addiction

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If you or someone you love has struggled with addiction, you know how difficult it is to get and stay clean. The road to recovery doesn’t go in only one direction, and as hard as it may be to accept, setbacks and relapses are part of the process. Although we all wish it were different, professionals in the field of addiction treatment don’t have a cure to offer. We do, however, have important information about the factors that improve the likelihood of long-term recovery. There’s no such thing as a one-size-fits-all recovery model, but the available research—and my own clinical experience—suggests that some factors are essential. Regardless of what form of treatment you receive or what kind of program you work, here are the fundamentals:

1) Readiness to Change – If you know anything about recovery, you know this one’s a no-brainer. No matter how bad things have gotten, no matter how much other people want you to change, if you’re not ready, it’s not happening. The truth is, it’s hard to take the first step. Sometimes even misery can seem safer than change, so taking action to do things differently is a courageous and commendable act.

2) Belief In the Ability to Overcome Challenges and Create Change – In psychology we call this self-efficacy. It’s basically a fancy term that refers to a person’s belief that he or she can make things happen. When it comes to recovery, this is crucial. Once you’ve decided to get clean, you have to have conviction that you can actually do it. This, of course, can be challenging, as past experiences may make it hard to see that change is possible. But every day clean and sober is an occasion to feel a little stronger, a little more capable. The beautiful thing about self-efficacy is that it builds on itself; the more positive changes you create, the more capable you feel, and the more capable you feel, the more energy you have to keep the positive changes going.

3) Maintenance of Psychological and Emotional Wellness – There’s a strong link that binds addiction, anxiety, and depression. Research shows that mental and emotional wellness are essential to a solid recovery program. Addressing the addiction without attending to any other dimensions of mental health is ineffective. People in recovery who suffer from untreated anxiety or depression tend not to stay clean for very long. When their symptoms become overwhelming, they seek relief; and since their brains are primed to seek a particular type of relief—in the form of their drug(s) of choice—it’s often only a matter of time before the untreated mental health issues result in relapse.

4) Support – This one cannot be understated. Study after study has shown that interpersonal support is essential to recovery. It isn’t easy to get and stay sober. Being in recovery—especially at first—can be terrifying and isolating. That’s why it’s so important to be surrounded by people who understand you; know what you’re going through; and are willing to stay by your side, cheering you on and keeping you focused when the going gets tough. Check out this 2015 Ted talk from Johann Hari, which offers a thought-provoking perspective on why support and connection are so vital to recovery.

5) Structure – Life in active addiction is often uncertain, unbalanced, unstructured, and unpredictable. That’s why a structured environment and routine are cornerstones of a successful recovery program. The research evidence and my experiences with clients make a strong case for the importance of setting up a clear structure and sticking to it. This means having a consistent routine and adhering to it every day. It means establishing a sense of organization and order with regard to daily tasks and responsibilities. It means attending to the basic activities of daily life, keeping a simple daily schedule that you can stick to, maintaining a balanced lifestyle, and making sure sobriety remains a priority. It might sound like a lot, but with a little help from the right supports, it’s completely possible—and it makes all the difference in the world.

6) Productivity – The last, but certainly not least, quality of a successful recovery program is productivity. Everyone who’s ever attempted sobriety can attest to the fact that boredom is a major trigger with enormous relapse potential. That’s why it’s so important to stay busy. The research suggests that people who engage in productive and meaningful activities tend to stay sober for longer. Whether it’s working at a job, engaging in a hobby, doing physical exercise, playing in an intramural sports league, fellowshipping at meetings, or volunteering in the community, staying productive is key to staying sober.

While this list contains proven factors that contribute to a solid recovery program, it is by no means exhaustive. If you’re new to recovery, it’s important to engage the support of a sponsor or mental health professional with experience in addiction. You are not alone, and yes, you can do this! Change is possible, and you are worth it.